Saint John's to Hire Saint John to be New Basketball Coach

The Saint John's University basketball team has decided to hire St. John as their new basketball coach. Terms of the agreement were not disclosed.

"Saint John brings the skill set and personality that we feel gives us a chance to compete at the highest level in the Big East" said St. John's Athletic Director Chris Monasch. "He has the resume and experience that we were looking for."

Vincent de Paul, also known as St. John, was a Catholic priest who was born in 1581. He has dedicated his life to serving the poor. St. John hopes that his team continues his community service and become more than just lousy Big East basketball players. If Saint John can't win basketball games at his own university, many New Yorkers feel like the program will be a lost cause.