Sarah McLaughlin Does Sappy Commercial for Carolina Hurricanes

With the Carolina Hurricanes struggling in their first 26 games, Sarah McLaughlin has agreed to do a sappy commercial on behalf of the underfunded Carolina Hurricanes. The Hurricane are currently in last place, only winning 5 games out of the 26. Here is a transcript of the commercial:

"Every few days in Raleigh, North Carolina or another NHL city, the Carolina Hurricanes disappoint their fans with lousy shots, bad decisions, and bad penalties. Last year, they had 45 wins. This year, only five.

Hi, I'm Sarah McLaughlin. I don't follow hockey, in fact I've never even heard of the Carolina Hurricanes. But when my agent came to me with a 5 figure sum in order to appear in a commercial for them, I agreed. Please donate money that you don't have to the Hurricanes. Right now, there are NHL players who have worked their entire life to get to this point and are stuck with the Hurricanes. Tickets to watch your team lose are on sale right now. Please donate to this worthwhile cause."